I have a doomsday countdown thingy on my home page. I noticed that there are 1,300 days left until The Big Poof on Dec. 21, 2012. The Big Poof may come a little sooner than that if somebody doesn't slip a little Thorazine into Kim Jong-il's tea. Dude is a little psychotic. Needs to have a heart-to-heart chat with Hirohito about history and the side effects of souped-up atoms.
When I read what North Korea is up to a scene from an old movie sifts up from the gray matter. The name of the movie is long gone and I don't remember any of the actors. The plot is that some kid hacks in to The Big Military Nuclear Missile Computer (TBMNMC) using an old boatanchor of a computer that isn't even capable of running Pong. TMMNMC goes on the offensive to launch a nuclear strike. It plays a zillion games of Tic-Tac-Toe, the runs a zillion nuclear strike scenarios.
The nuclear strike scenarios are what stick in my brain. On the wall is a huge map of the world. Arcs of light run back and forth between the continents, over and over and over. Somehow I can see that happening in real life sometime soon. Bright red arcs going east, bright orange arcs going west. Big blobs of color obliterating all the continents. Humm....
In the end the computer decides from playing all those games of Tic-Tac-Toe that it is pointless to play because there is no winner. Therefore, a nuclear strike is pointless because there would not be a winner either. The computer goes from DEFCON 5 back to DEFCON 1. The world is saved from nuclear destruction.
I think this movie should be translated into Korean post-haste and shown at video night next Friday in Mr. Kim's palace.
Now is not the time for the military to be kicking out any nice gay Korean-speaking linguists who can run a VCR.
Sunday, May 31, 2009
1300 Days
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8 comments:
Poor Kim...he just wants a little attention.
All I'm saying is if he cuts into our 1300 days, I'm gonna be one pissed off queen, and we know there's no wrath worse than that, especially in the afterlife when I'll have more time to plan my attack.
You've been warned, Kim. You've. Been. Warned.
I agree with you on this!
Kim Jong-il totally freaks me out!!
The name of the movie is 'Wargames',starring Matthew Broderick,and Ally Sheedy.
Speaking of movies and such,'The Mouse that Roared' is about a tiny piss-ant country that declares war on the U.S,so they can get all those reconstruction $$ after they lose..I'm guesssin' Kim has seen it,and been inspired.
You are so right, Kim scares me, but I think he is looking for attention and money. And cute gay asians.
I agree with you on all points. That last sentence most especially.
Do they have VCR's in N. Korea? I think they've all been stripped for parts to get that missile thing up and running. We may have to stage it as an interpretive dance or something. And all the dancers would be dressed to look like Kim. That would get his attention.
Stop making fun of Kim Jong. She's a very frail old woman with horrible cataracts.
Need to go rent Wargames now so I can laugh at their Apple II home computer graphics.
It's a brilliant plan right up to the part where someone's got to tell Jong-il what's on the movie menu. I have vague recollections of him loving himself Hollywood Musicals. Or maybe I got that from the SouthPark guys.
Shit. I can't keep my satire facts straight from my snoozing facts.
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